Church Of Doug

An alternative perspective to life.
I am the author, your host, who brought you to the Church Of Doug, out of the web of chaos.
  • You shall have no other browser bookmarks before me.
  • (While imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery,) you shall not make yourself a mirror site, for I am a jealous host, searching the web for those who copy me, but showing steadfast love to unknown numbers of those who love humor and keep my commandments.
  • You shall not swear at this humor in vain; for I will not hold him guiltless who swears.
  • Remember the salmon mousse, and keep it wholesome.
  • Honor your 'puter and your modem, that your days may be long in the laughter which I, your host, give you.
  • Kill:

    1. (v) Cause the death of (a person, animal, or other living thing).
    2. (v) Put an end to or cause the failure or defeat of (something).
    3. (v) Overwhelm (someone) with an emotion.
    4. (v) Pass (time, or a specified amount of it), typically while waiting for a particular event.
    5. (n) An act of killing, especially of one animal by another.
  • You shall not overwhelm someone with an emotion.
  • Adultry:

    1. (v) Voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than their lawful spouse.
  • You shall not talk about sex to anyone other than your spouse.
  • Steal:

    1. (v) Take (another person's property) without permission or legal right and without intending to return it.
    2. (v) Move somewhere quietly or surreptitiously.
    3. (n) A bargain.
  • You shall not move somewhere quietly or surreptitiously.
  • You shall not witness your neighbor bare.
  • You shall not cover your neighbor's house; you shall not cover your neighbor's wife, or his manservant or his maidservant, or his ox, or his ass, or anything that is your neighbor's.